Lumpy Lunch

Today, I had lunch at a place with the amazing name of Lumpy's Country Deli & Pie Shop. My apologies to my fans on chat who have already seen most of this, but I need to talk about it or I will explode. I mean, really, I may explode. Lumpy's is the kind of place that gives you so much food that you may explode if you eat it all.

Lumpy's is the kind of place that you pass while driving on the three-digit state highway that goes from one rural industrial town to another. You know, the place with the gravel parking lot full of phone company trucks.

Lumpy's is the kind of place that serves fish sandwiches on Friday every week of the year. Lumpy's is the kind of place w hose fish sandwiches are accelerating the desertification of our world's oceans. I mean seriously, Lumpy, if I may address you directly, I know Pittsburgh area restaurants try to serve as large a GIANT FISH SANDWICH as they can, but I'd probably pay the same price for a cute little fish sandwich.

Lumpy's is the kind of place that thinks mac&cheese is a vegetable. At least it's the good kind of mac&cheese, the kind that's been baked. At least, that's the only explanantion for the brown crusty bits that my brain is willing to consider.

Lumpy's is the kind of place that thinks cole slaw is a salad.

Lumpy's is the kind of place that makes all their own baked goods, which I guess is the only way they can find sandwich rolls with a high enough fat content.

Pittsburgh has a lot of good places to eat, many of them in what's called the Strip District. Lumpy's is nowhere near the Strip District.

2008.07.11 at 1:30pm EDT